Letters from your Mother

Dear B:

On a day like today, you are my therapy. I will never have the words to tell you how much you mean to me, especially since I don't speak canine. It has always seemed to be a blend of both italian and sign language, and quite frankly italiano was difficult enough. When everything seems to be going wrong, the one thing that puts a smile on my face is curling up with you and giving you a big teddy bear hug. You milk it, too. You let me smuggle you with kisses, engulf you in my arms. You will do whatever it takes to make me happy. And that moment, that, makes up for all the times you steal my underwear. For all the times you eat things you know you shouldn't, and yes, I know you know. I know the look in your eyes..the look that could melt my heart quicker than a bar of chocolate under the blazing hot sun. It's kinda like the Helen of Troy look. It's irresistable. So thank you. Thank you for being that little ray of sunshine when it seems like none can be found in a day like today. I promise, I will always be your ray of sunshine whenever you may need it.

Love,
The doodle mommy

Skip the charades

You wait on letters
Fishing for any sign of life
Drinks after dinner
Your friends will get you to unwind

Let's skip the charades
Can we just speak plain?

I'm two left feet when
I'm home we tapdanced on broken glass
Somehow you manage
To keep your sense of humor in tact

Let's skip the charades
You're seeing right through me anyway
Can we just speak plain?
We're playing for the same team 
But I'm the one that's acting like
Acting like
Acting like
I'm so strong
You're the one that's acting like
Acting like
Acting like
Nothing's wrong

You dodged the bullet
You do your best when you're busiest
You're disconnected
You can't find your name in the script

It was you who were wildest
It was you who floated above us all
I held on with wires
Will you come back down if I let you go?

Let's skip the charades
You're seeing right through me anyway
Can we just speak plain?
We're playing for the same team
But I'm the one that's acting like I'm so strong
You're the one that's acting like nothing's wrong
I'm the one that's acting like I'm so strong
You're the one that's acting like nothing's wrong

Can we skip the charades?
Just speak plain
Can we skip the charades?
Just speak plain
Can we skip the charades?
Just speak plain
Can we skip the charades?
Just speak plain.

Rainy Days

Every year on Father's Day, instead of thinking of sadness, I am reminded of all the beautiful memories I shared with my father. His humor was unmatchable. In fact, I have yet to meet one person who can make me laugh the way he could. His belief in my talent was also something that I will always remember. He once said to me, "I know you are capable of doing a million other jobs, but this is what you love. You must do music- it's YOUR future." 

In Kenya, rainy days are considered a blessing. Often during the summer in south florida, many people wish it wouldnt rain for just FIVE SECONDS so we could get to our car without being soaking wet, or so we could actually enjoy the many beach days we are blessed with. But since my trip to Kenya, I always find it difficult to complain about the rain. Sure, the sun is beautiful. Nobody can deny the beauty of a sunny, warm afternoon. However, with every white side there is always a black side. Rainy, thunderstorm afternoons on a day like today, Father's Day, don't make me sad, lazy, or tired. They give me excitement for the future. They remind me of how blessed I was to have my dad around in my life until I was 19. After all, he could have passed away when I was 6 years old. I would never have gotten to experience half the moments I did with him.

So today, as it pours outside and thunders, as the rumbles shake my patio window, I am thankful and feel blessings showering me. I am soaked in reminders of how much I love my dad, present on earth or not, I refuse to speak of him as a past tense. Because the rain...the water....reminds me of his love. His love for the water, the ocean, and everything it encompasses. It reminds me of the scattering of his ashes into the ocean. It reminds me that I am one lucky girl. Kenya, today is for you.